No, it wasn't.  You said: "I was basically a single parent from Jan-April every year which is most of the school year."  You were comparing yourself to a single parent by saying that you were "basically" one.  Working 9-3 (6 hours a day) after the kids are in school full time, along with actually being married and having somebody live with you that *could* help you if needed is not "basically" being a single parent.  If you think that this is jumping on your back, you seriously need to grow a thicker skin.

You did "very little"?  All you did was make sure they had time to do it?  How is that helping with homework?  Obviously, you don't realize that there are plenty of kids out there that need actual help, and that is what we are talking about.  We are talking about keeps needing their parents to actually help teach the subject since they aren't getting it in school. 

So, did you make time to help your kids, or did you just make sure that they had time to do it?  Those are two very different actions.

I would say that TW was basically a single parent while her husband was away. But not even then really, because as far as I know/remember, she didn't have to work to support the family. Now, if someone's husband or wife is in a coma in the hospital, they would basically be a single parent. I don't think it's something understandable at all unless you've been there, which is why bad comparisons get made. And yeah, it's not even close to the same thing.

As for homework in a house with a myriad of other activities, if you had had homework too, or had to bring work home, would you have been able to make time to help as well?

You have so much negativity toward teaching...why are you even a teacher? When you ask comments from parents, and you get a view contrary to your own, you get very defensive. Do you actually want other opinions, or are you simply looking for validation?

Have you READ the responses on this thread? Obviously not.

I was wondering if there is a way to get kids to turn in their homework, as simple as that.

Why am I a teacher? Because I love working with kids and their families. It's that easy.

So go ahead and make all your assumptions about whatever you want, KG. I just don't care.

exactly. There are many examples of this whether it involve the military, extended business trips or illnesses that come into play or in my case a husband that was working 80-90 hours a week to support his family during the busy times to make it thru the year when it's slower.



It's all about time management isn't it Jay?



both. First I made sure it was done and they had time to do it. Second I only helped them when it was necessary wanting them to figure things out. I definitely didn't want to be one of those parents who did their kids work. Seen that done way too much and it eventually backfires.



No, I thought we were just talking about whether it's a good thing for HW to be given out or not and how much is appropriate? We touched on some of the reasons for HW including but not exclusivly the need for a child to understand a particular concept the teacher may not have been able to convey to her student.

You know, KFC, I may have mentioned this before, but I feel very insulted and offended when you compare your husband working long hours to my experience as a military spouse.

My husband was gone for well over 14 months. As in he was not present AT ALL. He did not crawl into bed late at night or come home on the weekends. As far as household responsibilities were concerned it was as if he did not exist.

Just wanted you to know that, in case you care.   

Yes, TW we have talked about this and I did tell you many times there isn't a comparison. But still, keep in mind what it was like for me as well. To me, I felt alone and tired with three little boys all under the age of five when we started this whole CPA thing. To me, it felt like single parenting during those long winter months. IT's the best way I can describe it. I have qualified it many many times it's not as hard as what you are going thru...granted. Please understand I do know what you are speaking of. I no way want to minimize you.

But also keep in mind my girlfriend (the single parent I was speaking of) was totally a single parent. She had no husband even in the military she could discuss family with over the phone or email. He never came home on leave. He left her while she was pregnant with her second child and a 2 year old. She had no real job skills and had to go to work cleaning houses. It was awful for her. She was TOTALLY alone in all aspects and still is. I saw her struggles.

So believe me, I do understand where you are coming from, but please understand I too felt alone many nights and went to bed before he got home after taking care of the kids all day and night. I did this for the whole 21 years of our kids upbringing and sometimes I thought I was going to lose my mind. It got easier as time went on and the kids got older but it was still an ajustment every year.

Also my brother was in Nuclear Subs for the Navy going away 3-6 months a year leaving his young wife and children home alone. It about killed him to leave his kids. My other brother is a Navy Pilot. He also went away for extended times as well working the Gulf War.

Just wanted you to know, I do understand more than you think I do.

 

Yes, I did read.  And, yes, I do see your negativity.  If you "don't care", then why even comment back? I asked a question- you came back with a defensive remark.   Typical.

Nice way to dodge the question   

So, in your family, *you* had time for the kids, but your husband didn't? Interesting.

For tax accountants, January through April is the busy season. Some even work Sundays.

My MIL did taxes, but she still worked in time for the kids even with working 7 days a week during that time.

When people make comments like "it's all time management", then it should be considered for both parents, not one.  Otherwise, you are making the lifestyle choice that one parent is basically the parent and the other just works and isn't involved much.  There are a lot of people who use the argument that two people shouldn't work since the kids won't get enough attention.  However, how is that different than just one parent taking care of kids?  It's all lifestyle choices.

It was, but it went over like a lead balloon.

ummmmm unless I'm mistaken I took that as a direct question to you, not me.



Yes. That's just the way it is. You could say the same with anyone that has a husband away for extended time for whatever reason. You do what you have to do to make it work. Anyone with a seasonal type job is probably in the same boat. Anyone with a serious ill spouse would be too.



Yes this is true. It's very hectic. There is no life outside of tax season for the most part. They start gearing up for it in December getting everything in place and stocked up. And in our case my husband owned the business which makes it so much more stressful. For a while he had 500 clients all by himself. At the end he ends up putting in 90 hour weeks. He ended up hiring another accountant to help him but he went alone the first so many years.

So yes, HW, chores, family problems, leaky faucets, etc. all fell to me. There was no way he had time to deal with such things during this time every year. In the summertime and fall he had much more free time working a lot less to enjoy family time.

Yeah, you were mistaken, KFC. I was asking you. Sorry, maybe someday I'll learn to footnote my comments.(A)

Notes:
(A) Comment directed to KFC.

Whatever KFC. This just underscores why I struggle to be civil to you.

You have no FUCKING CLUE what it's like. Being an accountant's wife is NOT LIKE BEING A FUCKING SOLDIER'S WIFE.

Gone for 3-6 months in the Navy? Hahahahahaha. WHATEVER.

You will never understand.

 

 

Your husband wasn't "away".  Your spouse wasn't serious ill.  He made a lifestyle choice- one that caused him to neglect his family during that time....for financial gain.  He wasn't out serving his country, he wasn't out trying to change the world, he was doing taxes.  You have been very vocal on this site about your views on working Moms and people not spending enough time with their kids, yet you allowed your kids to not have their Dad around for financial gain.  I don't see how you can't see how your preaching on this site is so hypocritical.

LOL

I think that has adequately been proven...on many levels.  *sigh*